Thirty-Two Bird Names I Would Contribute If I Were an Ornithologist

1. Johnson’s Thrush
2. Brown Jumping Quaff
3. Pandora’s Baffle
4. Yellow-Eared Tiegslider
5. Jaundiced Terpsichore
6. Pink-Bellied Sneech Destroyer
7. Very Normal Bird #9
8. Grouch-Throated Arabesque
9. McQueeqy-McSqueeg
10. Brown Jumping Quaff Goes to London
11. Pink-Footed Trumpole
12. Roy
13. Jamaican Cat Dodger
14. Sartorial Eumonia
15. Brown Jumping Quaff Visits Sailor Moon
16. Gnostic Speed Warbler
17. Ryan’s Reynold
18. Threecan
19. Vermilion-Spotted Mandora
20. Lacy-Footed Tristesse
21. McSqueegy-McQueeg
22. Reticulated Thong Snatcher
23. Very Normal Bird #86
24. Thomason’s Hornbill
25. Brown Jumping Quaff and the Wrath of Piet Mondrian
26. Rumpole’s Ordinal
27. Eastern Cloudmonger
28. Tit-Licking Fump Rucker
29. Feathers McGee
30. Get Down from There
31. Show Me the Money
32. Jack